Oh the people you'll meet: Preston

When I first moved to the city I was in constant disbelief at the movie I was living in. 

"Oh my god Mary Kate and Ashley walked past here in New York Minute!" I would audible squeak to the utter hatred of my friend on a mid day food run. So you could imagine my joy when I got a job in Times Square a few weeks after I arrived. Just wait until the people at home heard that one! This is awesome! I was wrong. Times Square is my hell. As a naturally respectful person I spent way to long weaving, ducking and diving out of a tourists happy holiday snap or apologetically telling the oddball dressed as Elmo that I didn't want him to touch me. It was horrible, but it was never boring! 

The most bizarre experience though has to be the night I met Preston.

Now I'm not sure if Preston was his actual name, but he looked like a Preston so that is what he has been labeled. There I was dragging my ass to the train after being kept in at work later then expected due to an influx of tourists that decided to demolish the place just moments before closing, when a legal midget appeared at my side. Now, before I continue with my story, I have nothing against midgets, My Great Uncle is one in fact, but this is an important part of the story.

"Hello, How are you?" He muttered almost inaudibly (although to be fair there was about 2 feet between his mouth and my ears so maybe it just got lost in the sound of traffic). Presuming that it wasn't directed at me I picked up the pace to reduce the awkwardness that is walking directly next to a stranger.

"Nice night huh?" This time I stopped in my tracks and flipped my head in his direction. After being met with zero eye contact I continued walking and continued to ignore the muttering.Within a few steps the silence that had settled over us was interrupted,

"Hey Guys, Would you like to go to a comedy show?" (That's another thing about Times Square, you get asked this question every 4 steps at least. No matter how many times you insist you hate laughter). In a blur of tiredness I simply shook my head (I generally reply because I feel bad that these men probably spent 99% of their time getting ignored). I obviously choose the wrong time to ignore because this guy was a glorified sass master!

"Is it because I'm BLACK? FUCK YOU TWO! WHITE POWER GUYS! WHITE POWERRRRR!" He began to scream. Now when I say scream, I mean SCREAM, loud enough to cause a noticeable echo to bounce between the buildings and LCD screens that decorate Times Square. Luckily for me, I have learned to keep up stride in the midst of craziness and continued walking. That was when I felt an arm around my waist.

Ninja Reflex.

I swear my heart stopped, I probably jumped about 43 feet thinking that Crazy Comedy guy had followed me. Alas, it was only Preston.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?" Now honestly, I am not one to get mean in situations like this. Preferring to purely ignore/run away, but I was not in the mood for this tonight.

"Don't listen to him..."

"I'm not listening to him, and you are not putting your hands anywhere near me again I swear to god. I haven't said one fucking word to you, I don't know you, I don't want to know you, your creeping me out, GO AWAY!"

Now just picture me, at a slight 5'10'', yelling that a midget who reaches my bellybutton on the corner of a busy street at 3am whilst a guy clutching a sign that simply reads, Need money for Weed! Hey why lie? chuckles from a few feet away and you have my life.

I love New York.

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