I wrote this with two band aids on my fingers to hold my failing acrylics on.

     Today I opened this yee blog of mine to find that the most popular post currently was one I wrote almost 12 years ago called In the last 24 hours.... Intrigued at what 20 year old Jordan was up to in August of 2013, I had a little peak and tell me why my first thought was, this all happened in 24 hours? I was in the rain, on the subway, visiting friends, doing a juice cleanse, taking a joyride around Brooklyn and I still had time for some brownnosing

Now to be fair, I'm not saying I was curing cancer and inventing time travel but tell me why reading through that day transported me back to how bustling my life was at the time, how bustling I was! I was living in New York, in an apartment of 6, working with chatty colleagues and chatting with chatty friends, I was dating and hating and in hindsight moving at a mile a minute always. I was up all night and out the door early. I hadn't cooked a meal for myself in months, and my liver was holding on by a thread.

Now I'm not saying I'm 90 years old eating soup and crackers in a retirement home or anything. I still have chatty friends, but I no longer live in a loud messy apartment full of fellow bustling people with liquor bottles lining the cabinets. I no longer commute in crowded subway cars surfing my way through Manhattan, music blaring through my headphones. I now either work from home or commute 15 minutes to work in the back of an Uber in peaceful silence (Hell, I've even grown up from the poorer UberPool days of LA  Jordan, chatting to strangers and accidentally making friends). 

But I'm sure in 12 more years when I'm a completely new 43 year old Jordan, I'm going to want to know about today. So this is for her.

In the last 24 hours I...

...I went to the shops to stock up on art supplies to make a friend a marathon sign for this weekend (sidenote: ChatGPT really dropped the ball in the art of marathon sign suggestions!)

...I watched the Below Deck finale (I'll miss you Captain Jason) whilst brushing Norm and having a ruckus game of throwing stuffed ham toys all around the room (No seriously...the realest thing Lara did all season was have a sex dream about Captain Jason).

...I forgot my CEO was a grown woman who doesn't go to work to gossip and gab...sorry I like to have fun!

...I took my daily brisk strut around the neighbourhood, Perfect Day by Hoku blasting in my ears, nary a care in the world.

...I listened to hours and hours of The Telepathy Tapes while clicky clacking away at work and got silently annoyed whenever someone came in to my office and interrupted me (very fascinating. Is it real?...Am I going to google it and break my own heart? Who's to know! I texted my childhood best friend to chat about it and she hasn't responded yet...being grown up and busy is so lame.)

... I listened to this song on repeat. Did I know it yesterday? Nope. No idea where she came from but if there is one thing I'm going to do it's support my fellow redheads! 

...I painted a crappy picture. Hot Take: I love painting crappy pictures. I find it very therapeutic, like 1000 piece puzzles, the NY Times Crossword (Only Mondays and Tuesdays), mise en place and spray and wiping my surfaces. Just some good old fashion quiet time in my enclosure!  

...I booked a nail appointment (See title)

Screaming. Crying. Throwing Up.

 

Since October every 4 weeks or so I spend about 12 hours in agonizing abdominal pain.

I think I have gallstones.

What have I done about this I hear you question?

Sweet Fuck All.

That's not entirely true....I have made several Dr appointments but after the fog clears and I'm right as rain again, I cancel it.

Yet as soon as I feel the pain creeping in again I curse my past self before taking my place in a scalding shower and begin throwing up every thing I've eaten in the last 31 years.

Last night was one of those nights.

It took four refills of my trusty hot water bottle but I was finally able to fall asleep a few hours in and the best part is when I woke up? Good as gold!

One day I may go to the dr....or it will kill me...que sera

A Smatter of Saturday Thoughts.

• When you are walking two or three deep on a sidewalk and others are walking in an alternate direction, why oh why are we not immediately going single file? I would quite literally dive into a bush in an effort to not inconvenience a random stranger for some reason, and it makes me genuinely a little sad when people just have no consideration to do the same. 

• I don't have too many regrets and for that I'm incredibly happy but man oh man the fact I didn't capitalise on binging on Broadway shows more when I lived in New York? Huge regret. At one point I literally worked in Midtown, I had cash to splash, have been a musical lover since nappies and yet? I saw one or two a year? Flop!

• I respect people who are loyal to their brand and do you know who is the most loyal to his bits? My little brother. Made evident by the 9000 selfies I have clogging up my phone.

• Do you know what is a severely underrated snack? Pringles. From the age of 0-31 I ate probably like....10 singular Pringles max. In the last year? I'm definitely hitting triple figures. Texture? Superb. Flavour? Chefs kiss. Packaging? Cute and convenient. Once you pop you truly can.not.stop.

• Maturing if making sure you house is tucked in before going to bed. Past Jordan was a morning resetter. The throw blanket strewn across the couch? Folded in the morning. Dishwasher? Meh I'll empty it when I wake up. That bitch is dead. For a truly restful nights sleep my house now needs to be clean and tidy prior to shut eye. Trust me...waking up to order? Game changing!  

• Legally Blonde is truly an inspiring masterpiece. I have definitely said this on this blog before but I do not even care. I'll show you valuable Elle Woods can be before Watch Me Shine kicks in sits right next to Let's Go Girls! in the phrases that get a gal fucking going hall of fame.

• I really hope Oscar Piastri wins the 2025 Drivers Championship. 

• I'm a big fan of making soup. Forget sourdough this is my mid-life power hobby.

• I stand by the fact that B'Day is the best Beyonce Album.

• Remember Bud Light Strawberitas? Are they still a thing? Nothing would transport me back to 2013 quicker than a Stawberita! 

Life is a Marathon.

I have recently moved into a new home. Both literally, and on my Tiktok FYP. I now live on marathon TikTok, and I hope I never leave! 

Now I want to start by saying, I am not running a marathon. I truly hope the early-30's-hunt-for-purpose-hell-I'll-run-a-marathon! phenomenon never ever gets my new address. I do not want to do it. I don't want blood blisters or chafing, no sir. Keep it.

Although I do not want to personally partake in the blood and sweat of it all, I can understand the appeal. It's people throwing their body into a wall of pain for a plethora of reasons. They love to run, that high people speak of, an act of selflessness to raise money for others, or hey, life is feeling a bit directionless and putting one foot in front of the other is the best place to start.  

I send a big pat on the head and kiss on the nose to all of those people. I'm sure it is incredibly fulfilling but the piece of it all that truly fills my cup is all that is taking place around them.

The supportive, heart-warming joy a marathon seems to stir up in friends, family and strangers alike. My TikTok is full of people chanting strangers names in what I can only assume are moments of sheer pain and exhaustion. I've seen videos of people giving out bunches and bunches of bananas, Gordon Ramsey high-fiving shocked passers-by as he urges them to keep going and people frantically looking up bib numbers to be able to identify people by name as they shuffle by, shocked as a group of strangers cheers their name.

This energy isn't just from behind the barriers though. It's struggling runners, throwing their arms around each other under buckling knees to drag each other across a finish line that nobody is making them cross because they understand the effort it has taken to get there. Friends and loved ones circling back to cross these lines together.

Nothing is making these people do these things, hell, Gordon Ramsey is, I'm sure, a very busy man! They are simply out there spreading some love around. People being nice for the hell of it is one of the purest things in the world.

Everything can often seem so dark and depressing, especially with the amount of unnecessary hate being tossed around by certain world leaders  these days. It is easy to be negative, cynical and forlorn about the cards that are being dealt in front of you. 

Doom scrolling can sometimes be all doom, super gloom but every now and then you get little morsels or joy. Love and motivation and silliness. 

Unironically, I think one of the most beautiful move scenes of all time is the start of Love Actually. Marathon Tok belongs right there nestled under Hugh Grants words.

Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there – fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling love, actually … is all around.

I hope I never ever leave!