Flood Watch 2K22

 Back in January of 2015, I wrote a post about waiting for a blizzard to hit New York 

Fast forward 7 years and here I am again, waiting for a potential disaster yet thankfully, much more prepared. 

This is my backyard and that white patch under the tree is a lake....They always say....hey when it's flooding it's best of live right at the waters edge! Also 10 points for spotting the water dragon in the picture.

Back in 2015 at the ripe old age of 22, I only had a shitty bottle of Prosecco and some most likely stale popcorn. Fast forward to 28 and I have several bottles of rose, some Korean beef marinating for dinner (my new obsession is Gochujang...bury me in it!) and the $500 worth of new books I bought last weekend.

Wow, age really comes at you like a freight train, huh? 

Annnnnywayyy....I thought it only fitting that as I sit here and wait for another potential disaster, I update my list of "blizzard thoughts"...

Flood Thoughts

• This one here is a classic of mine aka I have annoyed my mum with this thought for a decade...but isn't the concept of a pet so bizarre? Normally, if an animal came racing through my home I would be very alarmed. Yet for some strange reason, we pick one particular animal of fur and sharp teeth, and think...this one is mine, you will live in my house and you will be my friend. You can not leave if you wanted to, I will dictate your entire schedule and you will love me. If a possum ran through my home the same size as my dog I would simply pass away but when pup races around the corner and tackles me, I think, Oh yay that is just Norman....a random animal I have named a ridiculous name and claimed as my own....Ok, I'm spiraling now. 
• I think Survivor is one of the greatest TV shows of all time....I 100% have spoken about this before on here...I just love Survivor man.
• I think weddings are the most ridiculous wastes of money I have ever heard of. If someone ever said to me, Hey I love you and now I want to blow $25,000 on a party I would simply get the ick and fade into the bushes Homer Simpson style. Seriously, who even likes 150 people? I like about 15 at a bush. I think if I was ever with someone who for god knows what reason craved a wedding, my actual response would be ok fine let's meet in the middle....a grazing platter and some drinks in the backyard and never EVER make me kiss you whilst everyone we know watches on otherwise I'm taking Norman and we are outta here! 
• I only like cooking if I can take my time and prep all my ingredients. I have these little Le Creuset bowls that are the perfect size for my intricately minced garlic and diced onion. It really adds to my dreams of cooking show grandeur.
• It blows my mind that people can simply brand Taylor Swift as untalented since they don't like her music. I'm hardly a Swifty, yet I think she has an amazing ability to craft a story into a catchy fucking song! I think people like to paint young female "popstars" with this same bimbo brush and call it a day. The fact that they sing pop music, aimed at females somehow makes them untalented and simple for a young female has no taste. She is branded boy crazy and simple, who wants to hear another song about love and heartbreak? Yeah dope, tell that to any musician ever. 
• On Thursday night there was a 120 million lottery draw, and my coworkers and I all had a discussion had a big chat about how we would spend our winnings and it absolutely blew my mind that most of them didn't want to give a lot of it away to there loved ones, no strings just...here let's share this. The thing that would thrill me the most about winning a ridiculous sum of money would be giving that shit away to those I love so they could share in it.  Hell, what did I do to deserve it anyway? It's not like I would have toiled away for the money,  it just fell into my lap so fuck it, everybody take a piece. Also, this isn't me being all high and mighty but like...what joy would I have living large while someone I loved worried about how to pay there bills? Nah man
• My entire life I was convinced the lyric to Me and Bobby McGee by Janis Joplin was "Windshield Wipers, Turpentine,  I was holding Bobby's hand in mine..." and you can not convince me "slappin' time" is literally anywhere in that lyric. I simply do not hear it! (I want to clarify that I can hear it in the Kris Kristofferson version but let's be real.....there is only one version that matters...sorry not sorry)
• Speaking of Janis Joplin, as a 28 year old, I find the idea of the 27 club so wild. There is nothing like looking at a picture of Janis Joplin and thinking shit man, she was younger than me in this picture? Like I'm sorry, when I see a picture of Jimi Hendrix I see a whole man, not someone who was never older than I am now. That sir, is wild. 
• I wouldn't call myself a people pleaser, but I have this weird need to be viewed as helpful, even if it means I over extend myself and bitch about you constantly while performing said task, I will never actually say no to a request for assistance. 
• I am also a big rule follower. Which seems confusing if you know me and my personality, I don't seem the type, but I don't like getting into trouble so would rather follow the rules to avoid the risk of being reprimanded as my default reaction to getting in trouble is bursting into tears...and that shit is just embarrassing. 
• My favorite song for like a decade strong was Pocketful of Rainbows by Elvis...but in the last year it was dethroned by Bright Side of the Road by Van Morrison....it's just such a fucking jam I don't even care. 
• This is what a baby angel looks like..

• Watermelon is the superior fruit...even though I think I may be allergic...
• I could be a vegetarian if I only ate Indian food for the rest of my life...
• I understand the hype about The Beatles and Elvis but can't see it with Bob Dylan and Led Zepplin.
• I have a theory that some foods need to be introduced to us as children for our palates to understand them...which is why American's struggle with things like Vegemite/Marmite...yet they lap up a taste like Root Beer that is baffling to those of us who didn't grow up with it.

I think that's all I have rolling around up there a the moment.

I'm going to go and play indoor fetch with Normie whilst we wait to get washed away! 

Score!